By Kevin Wilson
For males between the ages of 4 and death, there is an unwritten rule that nearly everyone must abide by. Simply put, if one finds something that smells terrible, he’s obliged to present it to nearby friends who are, in turn, required to give it a “courtesy sniff.” There will be much retching and gagging and swearing, but it’s a way of bonding in that uniquely male way that sometimes makes me wonder how we survive as a species. Any females in the room will likely be pressed to participate, but usually have the good sense not to.
Well, guys and gals, get a load of this shit:
This, ladies and gentlemen, is the comically named Coalition to Stop Gun Violence encouraging their followers to call the cops on concealed and open carry holders because guns are scary, you guys.
What in the actual fuck, over?
Let’s ignore, for a second, the fact that this is a seriously bad idea. We’ll get to that in a minute. I just want to point out that telling people to call someone armed with a gun because they’re scared of someone with a gun is possibly the most hypocritical thing I have heard all week, and I follow that morass of stupid goddamn ideas crossed with good intentions that is the Feel the Bern hashtag.
Let us all take a moment to bask in the brilliant glow of the irony for a moment.
Everyone good and tan now?
Cool beans. Now lets get back to how this is a remarkably bad idea.
In a statement made to Fox News, Ladd Everitt, director of communications for the Coalition to Stop Gun Violence, went on to explain the reasoning, such as it is, behind their call to harass law abiding citizens.
“In an era in which individuals are being allowed to carry loaded guns on our streets with no permit, background check or required training, it is common sense for concerned citizens to call 911 when they see an armed individual whose intentions are unclear… These [open carry] laws guarantee that we—and law enforcement—will have no idea about the criminal and/or mental health background of these individuals until they actually commit a crime; and by then it could be far too late. We have full confidence in our men and women in blue to assess these situations.
“Gun-toters who are truly law-abiding and mentally competent have nothing whatsoever to worry about. Their conversations with law enforcement will be brief and professional. As for those who are dangerous and have something to hide which would not withstand the scrutiny of a background check or permitting process, they should expect to face some tough questions as a result of these 911 calls. And that makes us all safer.”
In other words, they’re calling for their followers to use the police to harass law abiding citizens simply to make a point. And the hell of it is, so long as they’re just reporting that you have a gun, that’s not illegal. Now if they make up shit about you waving it around or making threats, that’s another story altogether.
I personally am a fan of open carry, so long as it’s done as a modicum of common sense. Strolling through town with a loaded AR held at the low ready is pretty fucking stupid if you ask me, but a handgun on the hip, when carried in compliance with state and local regulations, is perfectly sensible. In my case, it’s a necessity, because there’s not a holster in the world that’ll make a Colt 1851 Navy with a 7 ⅜ inch barrel inconspicuous.
I’ve never had a problem with exercising my right to open carry. In most cases, police don’t even give me a second glance, because open carry in North Carolina is just a fact of life. I’ve had a few ask what the hell it was, but that was just curiosity. No one expects to see something out of a western show up at someone’s hip in a gas station or something.
That will all change in a hurry, however, if the story goes from law abiding citizen encountering an office through the daily course of business to an encounter caused by a panicky 911 call with the words “He’s got a gun.”
Though the vast majority of police officers are excellent at their jobs, they are human. Not only are they humans, but they’re humans dealing with a stressful job that brings them into contact with the worst dregs of humanity. Theirs is not a safe job. They know that any call can be their last. In the last few years, they’ve also had to deal with the backlash from the media from just doing their damn jobs, all because a few assholes had to take things too far, or because the public decided they knew how to enforce the law better than the law enforcement officers. Couple that with the recent string of police murders across the country, and tensions are high enough as it is.
When they get a call that there’s someone scary with a gun, they’re going to take it deadly serious, and anyone who doesn’t isn’t worth their badge. There might be lives on the line, dammit, theirs and others. Meanwhile, the gun owner in question is going to be in for one hell of a shock. If they’re lucky, they’ll be held at gunpoint and disarmed until the police can sort it out. Their day is ruined, and probably their underpants too.
Now, Mr. Everitt posits that such interactions will be brief and professional, so long as the gun owner in question has nothing to hide. I would posit that Mr. Everitt is a fucking idiot if I thought he believed that for a second, but I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that’s not the case.
These douche nozzles don’t want a brief and professional meeting. They have their agenda, and they’ll use whatever cowardly, underhanded, and downright disgusting tactics they can in the pursuit of it. Anyone who has dealt with these types before knows that they have a common philosophy: there are no bad tactics, only bad targets.
Scaring the shit out of someone running to the store for a pack of smokes and a soda is great, but if they can instigate something that makes the six o’clock news, that’s even better.
They don’t care that lives could be ruined, or that they could be distracting officers from actual emergencies. No, in their minds, this isn’t about right or wrong. This is about good and evil, and any blow against evil is one worth striking.
Does that mean that we should all just leave our guns at home and hope for the best?
Hell no.
Rights are meaningless if we let ass clowns like this intimidate us into not exercising them, and I for one am not going to risk my family’s safety over the fear that someone might call in a false police report on me. 
The best thing you can do is know the law, know your rights, and don’t be an idiot. If you do find yourself in this situation, remain calm and comply with all lawful orders given. Screaming and cursing will accomplish nothing. The police are simply doing their job, and it’s not their fault that some twat waffle decided to use them for nefarious reasons.
As for the aforementioned twat waffles, they’ll get what’s coming to them. There’s only so many times they can try that stunt before folks get tired of it, and karma is a bitch.
It’s estimated that there are around 100,000,000 gun owners in the U.S. The smart money says more than a few of those 100,000,000 are willing to spend the night in jail if it means the twat waffles catch an ass whooping for their scumbagassery. Just make sure it’s not one of you guys.